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My Christmas List

Ok

So I know I’ve been a bit distant lately, I’ve moved my location from the suburbs of Philadelphia to the farmlands of North Carolina.  I have a new bunker…well house really but seriously a house made entirely of concrete and steel is it really a house or is it a bunker.  Semantics always did bother me even as a child in school.  So before I go out of control on my silly rant lets just say i have a nice safe place to repel zombies and any other uprising for a good amount of time.

lets see what else we got.  I got very little for Christmas besides being able to spend it at home with my wife and child.  I did get to play a bunch of new games Assassins Creed being one of them and making me extremely glad to be alive.  I LOVE ASSASSINS CREED!!!!  I also watched a few movies Inglorious Bastards, Hangover, and Angels and Demons.  Had a TON of food and basically relaxed and caught my family time in for the year.

To recap my game playing I have been playing alot of Trails HD a downloadable game on XBOX Live and Assassins Creed.  Both games have kept me pretty busy along with the normal day to day responsibilities of being a father.  So hopefully I will have some time to update my movies sometime later this week and I will keep you guys updated on all the new movies.  NO NEW MOON REVIEWS that I can promise you!

ZOMBIE OUT

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January 6, 2010 Posted by | Normal Stuffs | 3 Comments

Horror Corner ZombieLand

I was hoping to be more active this month.  I was hoping to have a satisfying career and a huge plot of land with a concrete bunker stocked with weapons ammo and food by this time in my life.  Things don’t always happen like ya plan em though.  Just sometimes things happen.  So I’m going to make the best of it and plod on as always,  albeit a bit late and WAY off track.  So lets just say im undependable and we can all love me for my faults.  Let’s get back to what matters.

ZOMBIELAND!

OK.  let me just say that as comedic as this movie really is it’s SPOT ON.  the rules to live by, the realities wrapped in humor, the relationships forged and the absoloute horrible truth of surviving in a zombie apocolypse. 

The characters are fun and likeable, and the suprise cameo while shortlived is absolutely PERFECT for this movie.  Woody is an absolute perfect match for the character and plays his role to an absolute T. 

The Zombies while not completely Romero Zombies are still mostly believable, no superhuman strength and no weird flying powers are bestowed upon them.  They are in fact the living dead.  Good old plain and fancy Zeds.

The story while not gripping does get you involved,  it makes you laugh,  and it allows you to immerse yourself.

All in all this is more of a good time fun movie than an all out comedy laugh fest, and its definately not a horror movie per sea.

Go see this movie, horror fans and stiffs alike will love this movie.  Something for everyone and blah blah blah.

October 28, 2009 Posted by | The Horror Corner | , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Friday Night Horror Corner SAW

SAW directed by James Wan The first of, I believe 6 films so far.  This video was a sledgehammer to the knees of old school wannabe crap horror we have been used to lately.  Saw was the first horror movie that didn’t make you afraid of the protagonist.  He wasn’t a scary superhuman entity following you around with a knife after a sorority hump festival in the woods.  The movie made you afraid of your choices, would I kill my friend to save my own life, could I be given a new life?  It made you think if you were worthy of that new life.  But that also begs the question, when you watch the movie who did you sympathize with.  Who was your anti-hero?  Did you root for the cops to find the bad guy did it make you feel bad to root for the bad guy.  Instead of trying to scare you with clowns popping out of sewers this movie scared you with your own dark inner feelings.  It made you question yourself and what you were capable of to live. 

 The immediate impact of this movie was a good frightening show with plenty of entertainment value.  The long term impact included 6 more movies and a slew of other torture horror or as its now called torture porn.  Torture porn not to be confused with actual pornography, this became a genre of horror which spawned movies from Japan and Germany.  The genre confused and confounded the horror community bringing them closer to the quality of movie they had been begging for since the early 90’s. 

 If you haven’t seen this movie yet your living under a rock and you should go see it.  Grab a bucket of beer and a can of popcorn and rent this one tonight.

 You won’t be disappointed, sleep deprived maybe but not disappointed.

September 26, 2009 Posted by | Normal Stuffs, The Horror Corner | Comments Off on Friday Night Horror Corner SAW

Friday night Horror Corner

So tonight I would like to introduce you to my nightmare.  As if flying wasnt horrible enough, Samuel L Jackson got tired of snakes being on his plane so he booted them off hardcore SLJ style.  He put the wrath of god up in some snakes.  Unfortunately the passanger manifest from a flight from LA to Paris did not include uncle Sam.  Woe to the passangers of this ill fated flight who must now battle infected scientists and military gaurds. 

Flight of the Living Dead AKA Plane Dead

GOOD LORD WHO WRITES THIS GARBAGE.

The movie was campy and slightly over the top but it came out months after snakes on a plane which makes me think someone saw the movie and thought.  Hey lets do it with zombies.  I mean come on people where is the originality and ingenuity anymore.  The movie was every other zombie movie ever made it was just a different environment.  It had nothing that was suprising or original and it was truthfully boring.  usually I get some kick out of the really bad or really low budget zombie films but this one was just horrid.  Now maybe it was my anger at being forced to watch snakes on a plane (because I WILL watch anything with Samuel L Jackson in it), but this film was pretty bad.  I think it was the air of importance that this film had about itself that angered me.  Who knows, all I know is this is NOT a Romero level film, don’t be suprised by the film being subpar.

I’m not even going to go any further with this debacle.

If you watch this movie take a bottle of your favorite liqour along for the ride.

SHEESH!

next week a disertation on the history and social impact of important zombies and their rise to power among the film world.

August 28, 2009 Posted by | The Horror Corner | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Friday Night Horror Corner Day of the Dead

George A Romero’s 1985 zombie trilogies last episode was more about the human interaction between survivors and less about zombies.  Three distinct groups of people dominated this movie, civilians, scientists, and soldiers.  The group was sent to an underground compound to study the zombies and create a cure for the problem.  The soldiers were sent to protect the scientists and the civlians were sent to serve the soldiers and scientists.  Towards the end of the movie you see the breakdown between people who have lost hope, people who are in the last thows of civilization.  The possibility of the underground bunker containing the last vestiges of humanity make the soldiers edgy and willing to break down civilized laws, it makes the scientists disregard scientific morality, and makes the civlians want to pack up and head for the beaches.  This movie is yet another of Romeros insights into the human condition.  The lack of communication is what eventually leads to the breakdown which inevetably gets a majority of people killed and a few escape. 

The last of the “trilogy” but not the last of the Romero films this movie leaves a bit to be desired from the first two films but should still be watched as a cult movie.  Not as succesful as the first two films but still has the distinct Romero feel to it it is a definate to be watched film.

So curl up on the couch and grab yourself a bottle of your favorite get hammered beer and have some fun watching this one.

 

OR if you feeling particularly daring watch the three romero movies than watch contagium and return of the living dead.

so untill next friday remember dont go into the basement and don’t open that door.

August 14, 2009 Posted by | The Horror Corner | Comments Off on Friday Night Horror Corner Day of the Dead

GBU CellPhone Zelda

 

Couple of days ago I was browsing online for a new free app for my phone.  Cause im cheap like that and I don’t really want to pay 4 bucks a month to be able to listen to songs online or 3.50 to immediately recognize those songs and have it download the song for me the next time i load my iphone to my itunes.  Not that I have an iPhone although I wanted one.  Just couldn’t get past the price.  So I was browsing for a nice little calander app that I could synch with some online things I have going on to be able to access them from my phone.  So I accidentally hit last page, and BOOM fate would have it that Zelda was on the last page.  So free download BONUS i ended up grabbing it to check it out later.   

Good:  This is the ultimate of nostalgia on your phone.  I have seen pac-man and asteroids on the phones but ZELDA!  Come on man who didn’t love that freaking game.  Now I have it on my FREAKING PHONE!  Awesome.  The graphics are about par to the original graphics and its the same basic gameplay.  Some of the functionality and dungeons arent there yet cause the game isnt totally finished.  But it is the zelda you remember same exact layout and same characters.  Its great.

Bad: The gameplay is great but the controls are not really easy to get used to although once everything is set up and working correctly for you its wonderful to play. 

Ugly: Ehh some of it isnt finished and its a bit rough to play in some areas and its not exactly the game i remember but hopefully once i pull up the old console and wipe out the zelda I will hopefully be impressed by the cellphone port.

August 13, 2009 Posted by | Good Bad and the Ugly - Game Reviews, Normal Stuffs | Comments Off on GBU CellPhone Zelda

GBU game review for Call of Duty World at War Map Upgrades.

Good: Nazi Zombies level. Fight off the invasion from inside a bunker or a mansion house or one of four other locations. OH MY GOOD BABY LORD JESUS. As you can tell this game was indeed MADE FOR ME. This is quite possibly the most perfect game upgrade ever. It doesn’t cost a thing to get the first one but the next three are each gonna cost ya pointage. So what though, ZOMBIES! Seriously can anything be better than simplicity of killing zombies and not having to worry about traversing an entire level. You simply have to defend a set position from approaching zombies through as many waves as possible. It’s brilliant because its simple and fun. As you kill zombies and fix barriers to keep the nasty undead out you get cash that you can spend to upgrade weapons, buy more ammo, or unlock more areas to exploration. 

Bad: Nothing…seriously. The game itself is already on my top ten all time must haves, now it has moved to my top 10 must have never going to trade in games.

Ugly: I haven’t played any of the online multiplayer maps because I cannot break away from the zombie levels. I mean seriously so bad I almost didn’t go to work this morning.   Also I don’t believe Ive showered in a few days.  Hmm maybe thats why nobody at work will talk to me.

 

Seriously.  LurkerBelow and AtomicZombie fueled by Mountaindew and BBQ sammiches cannot be stopped by Zombies.  NOTHING CAN STOP US!  Except maybe a severe lack of really good BBQ joints in Philadelphia.

 

Road trip to Texas?

August 13, 2009 Posted by | Good Bad and the Ugly - Game Reviews | , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on GBU game review for Call of Duty World at War Map Upgrades.

Friday Night Horror Corner

I apologize to all my friends out there looking for a good friday night scare.  My absence last week and part of this week were due to new responsibilities in my life.  I am now a gainfully employed member of society and getting back into the swing of things has been a bit shall we say disorienting.  So as my friend says after a particularlly nasty fragging “cry more newb”  So that is precisely what Im going to do.  Im going to cry for a bit.  But those tears will be tears of happiness and terror all at the same time.  Because this week I bring to your attention a movie which shaped my life, which made my teenage years a bit more formative.  While my schoolmates were off partying it up I was sitting at home researching zombies, how to defeat them and how to create them.  And damned if Max Brooks didn’t get the books out before me.  I would have been rich beyond my wildest dreams!  I don’t dream very big, really.  So anyway without further ado I bring to you the Trifecta of zombie movies.  The first in the series of the trilogy of the walking dead.

Night of the Living Dead

This George A. Romero film debuted in  1968 and for the time was a poignant reminder of the times.  Throughout the movie there are subtle social commentaries of the time, most especially the ending.  This movie far from being the first ever zombie movie(reserved for the 1932 classic White Zombie) is the first ever “zombiepocolypse” movie and spurred the entire genre into overdrive, creating masterpiece after masterpiece of low budget B-movie greatness.  Night of the Living Dead centers around a group of survivors in a small rural pennsylvania town trying to survive an unknown catastrophe.  After a space exploration satelite explodes in the atmosphere creating a possible radiation event the dead begin to rise from their graves.  The characters in this movie encompass all walks of life.  The young athlete, the well to do black man, and the family with the overly agressive father.  I won’t ruin the movie for you but I will tell you this.  “shoot em in the head and they stay dead.”

This movie is a wonderful addition to any horror buffs collection and would do well with anyone who is a lover of great black and white movies.

So curl up on the couch turn off the lights grab yourself a Fullers London Porter and enjoy a good movie with a friend, or a girlfriend, whichever ya got.

Goodnight fiends I will continue the trilogy next week with Dawn of the Dead a great movie with another low budget and an amazing Director.

August 1, 2009 Posted by | The Horror Corner | , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Friday Night Horror Corner

Tonight I decided to do an old movie.  A movie also discussed on the 18th Podcast.  A movie called Wickerman.  So sit back and enjoy the review Dreammachines.

 

Wickerman directed by Robin Hardy came out in 1973 starring Christopher Lee and a few other names.  But I’m no name dropper plus I don’t think anyone would recognize the other people in this movie.  The plot of this movie revolves around a police detective traveling to a small island to investigate a series of suspicious murders.  I’m sure you can imagine what happens next on this small island.  The plot line is notoriously thin but the atmosphere of the movie is fairly well developed for such a small budget film.  This low budget film seems to embody the heart and soul of what similar low budget films of today have lost, the ability to rivet the audience no matter the cost of production.  In my opinion  low budget films today have lost the ability to pull the audience in to tell the story correctly. 

Wickerman has all the frights and spooks to keep you going through the movie but don’t expect it to scare your socks off.  The story should be enough to keep you entertained and hopefully give you a real dose of authentic storytelling.  As for nightmares I would expect you to have an uneasy night but nothing to bad, probably just the dream where your naked in high school again.  Well, well pizza got here early.  Looks like a cold beer and a hot slice await me.  Also a nice scary movie with some friends and a couple of drunken laughs should be good times.   Till next Friday, Don’t screw with Jason’s weed man just don’t do it.

July 17, 2009 Posted by | The Horror Corner | , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Friday Night Horror Corner

GBU game review – Resident Evil 5

From Wikipedia
From Wikipedia

So I’ve been slacking a bit lately and lurker has been cracking the whip.  Ok so he’s been nicely asking me to throw up a GBU for a recent game I’ve played.  Best pseudo boss ever LOL.  So I’ve been playing Resident Evil 5 lately as a break from Prototype.  I’ve heard all the hype about this game being a first person race war shooter.  White guys against black guys.  Unfortunately the people who review these games at first glance don’t usually remember or care about the back story.  The progenitor virus which was the Umbrella Corporations big breakthrough in regeneration of dead cells started as a discovery in the heart of Africa, where as it so happens most of the people living there are indeed of African decent.  I just hate that people jump to the conclusion that it was a race related game when all they got to see was a demo that happened to have a  bunch of black zombies being killed by a white guy and a black girl.

So whatever let’s do a good bad ugly.

GOOD:  The game play is reminiscent of resident evil 4, game play and controls are basically what you are already used to.  The AI for your smoking hot helper who has a very nice accent is very advanced.   She can be set to cover you to be aggressive or to hold.  And bonus if you destroy the B.S.A.A emblems through the whole game she has a separate outfit that she wears SMOKIN!  Also the storyline to this one brings a lot of the series to a conclusion of sorts.  The ending which I won’t ruin is very surprising.

BAD: Ammo is scarce except on the easiest level forcing you to shoot a bad guy once and punch them for a finish, which to me isn’t as gratifying as shooting things.  However its nothing that isn’t expected.  All Resident Evil games have ammo spaced few and far between.  I still wish I could spray and pray instead of sniping with a pistol.

UGLY:  The Lickers come back.  I HATE LICKERS!  No really I hate the freaking Lickers.  Worst B.O.W.S ever made.

July 17, 2009 Posted by | Good Bad and the Ugly - Game Reviews | , , , , | Comments Off on GBU game review – Resident Evil 5

The Horror Corner – Session 9

So here I sit a dismal but sunny Friday morning. I have been absent from the game reviews and for that I apologize. I know my thongs of adoring fans are beating themselves silly right now with anticipation of whether or not I’m going to post my Horror movie reviews. So without kidding myself any further about my own popularity I’ll get right to Session 9. If you listened to the 18th podcast you heard richieraw and myself mention this thriller of a movie. Not so much a gore fest or a fright show its more of a psychological thriller that keeps you guessing the entire time. Session 9 directed by Brad Anderson released in 2001. The movie centers around a group of Asbestos removal technicians who are working to rehabilitate an older mental facility. This team is filled out by such societal winners as a law school dropout, a dreamer with the hopes of one day running a casino, the bitter lonely guy and the new guy with severe fear of the dark. This motley crew of weak and wounded workers makes the movie that much more appealing. The character development takes place sequentially throughout the film and allows you to gradually get to know each of the guys on the crew, right before they are murdered. The ending of the film is a bit heavy and relays the fragility of the human mind. Now you all know I’m not going to ruin the movie for you so grab yourselves a six pack of a nice amber beer, a girl who isn’t easily scared, and turn the lights off and surround sound up. I’m sure all you dream machines out there will love this movie for its absolute creepiness factor.

July 10, 2009 Posted by | The Horror Corner | , , , , , , | Comments Off on The Horror Corner – Session 9

Friday Night Horror Corner- The Bunker

As I sit here writing my review I’m several beers into an unemployed Friday night.  So the last few days I have been overloading my brain with internet job searches, video games, and spending copious amounts of time with my daughter.  As any one of you might guess I’ve also been pulling out the old DVD’s and watching a few horror movies.   Tonight I’ve saved the best for a drunken Friday night with friends.  The Bunker,  a movie about a squad of Nazi soldiers pushed back to a bunker in the middle of nowhere.  A time honored plot line of a building being built over unholy ground a la poltergeist  1 – a million.  The soldiers are holed up in a bunker versus an imaginary American force surrounding them.  As the soldiers succumb to various hallucinations and increasing paranoia things start to go wrong when one of them decides to go to the underground tunnels to find a way out.  Of course the “Americans” get into the tunnels and start to kill them off one by one.  Well as you might suspect things go seriously downhill when the flashbacks and hallucinations begin causing people to lose their minds.  Serious bouts of anger and delirium are whittling away at the morale of the group.   Because I don’t want you to hate me for spoiling the movie, people die and the movie ends.  So to wrap this up before I black out or the thunderstorm were having kills my internet, this is another Nazi suspense wartime movie.  I will be shifting next week to zombie movies and really getting into the down and dirty.  So for now Dream Machines this is atomiczombie tuning in and tuning out.

 

Keep your baseball bats and machetes ready for next week.  We might have a nice heated discussion about the perfect zombie weapons and how to survive a zombie apocalypse.

June 26, 2009 Posted by | The Horror Corner | Comments Off on Friday Night Horror Corner- The Bunker

GBU Tomb Raider: Underworld

If there is one thing I like just as much as zombies its Vikings.  Which is understandably weird since I’m a Scotch Irish Englishman, which basically means I fight with myself a lot.  So understandably Tomb Raider Underworld set off my Viking alarm almost as hard as VIKING did.  And if you haven’t played Viking I’ll be reviewing that one next week.  So here we go Lara Croft’s 8th time in a video game and one of the better Tomb Raiders.

 

GOOD:  If crystal Dynamics hit Tomb Raider legend out of the park this pitch they hit off the planet.  The game play was intense.  Shoot a chip off a wall in the maze level to mark which way you are going and how to get back.  The environment is your biggest foe in this game, in fact only two levels where your racing against time to stop the bad guys all while being shot at.  And really the only shooting is in the initial phase of the levels.  The motorcycle levels include puzzles that you need the motorcycle to solve.  Plus it is really fun to ride around on a motorcycle through ancient ruins and up walls and over huge gaping chasms.  The storyline shores up some of the loose ends created in the Legend and Anniversary titles allowing the player to finally get a full picture of what has been happening to Lara and her family.  Also the story of Ragnarok, Mjolnir, and Valhalla are intertwined into the storyline to offer a bit more depth to the puzzles and their meaning.

BAD:  As with most Tomb Raider games of this caliber it was entirely too short, however it was still gripping and kept me entertained for hours on end.

UGLY:  The ending looks like the end of the Tomb Raider storyline, however hopefully Crystal Dynamics will bring a new story line to this franchise and allow the die hard fans such as myself to continue playing these amazing puzzle action games.

June 25, 2009 Posted by | Normal Stuffs | , , , , , | Comments Off on GBU Tomb Raider: Underworld

Friday Night Horror Corner: The Keep

Fiends, Slayers, and mummy men, lend me your fears. For tonight we delve into the darkness and the abyss. This movie is not so much terrifying and horrific, but more suspenseful and thought provoking. Who is enemy and who is friend, and how do you tell the difference. It won’t give you nightmares for years to come but it will entertain you and maybe make you jump a little here and there. So tonight I bring to you a movie from my own collection of favorites. The Keep, directed by Michael Mann, the man who brought you The Last of the Mohicans, Miami Vice, Hancock, and Public Enemies (the new Johnny Dep film). The movies musical score is written by non other than 80’s musical sensation Tangerine Dream and stars Gabriel Byrne, Jürgen Prochnow, Scott Glenn, and none other than the white wizard himself SIR Ian McKellen. Although chock full of amazing actors and a pretty solid plot this movie was battered at the box office because of its Supernatural twist. Had this movie come out 4 years later it would have been an absolute SMASH hit.

The story centers around a platoon of WWII Nazis in Romania looking to occupy an old Castle Keep to protect a small mountain pass from advancing Russians. However when they arrive at the keep the greed of the German soldiers awakens something evil and dark. A couple soldiers get capped and the evil wakens fully the SS show up and bring in a Jewish scientist. Jewish scientist helps them… Look I can’t really give away too much more of this film because let’s face it; most of these movies are pretty low on plot anyways. Oh and before you say jeesh zombieboi what’s the fascination with Nazis. I assure you it’s not a thing with zombies it’s a thing with war. War is intrinsically fascinating to me but that has nothing to do with what’s going on here.

My suggestion, grab a pizza, a sixer, and a lady and watch this movie. It’s not scary enough to put a chick under the couch, but it’s just scary enough to give her the willies. At the end of the movie offer to escort her home to keep her safe from the evil lurking in the dark.

A good beer for this movie would be a Hefeweizen from Stoudts brewery, although I guess any hefe would work.

Alright freaks and geeks ill see you all next friday

June 19, 2009 Posted by | The Horror Corner | , , , , | 5 Comments

Windows 7 Review

I’m going to give a bit of my background to give a bit of weight to my review. I am a lifelong windows fan and an old school pc fps gamer. So I’ve water-cooled, I’ve over-clocked, and I even put a computer in a mini-fridge. My job is to take care of computers, hardware, software, and everything in between. I’ve been using the beta version of windows 7 for some time now, and I would like to share some things with everyone.

First things first when you install windows 7 it’s very simple to install. XP and Vista were both clunky as installs and very time intensive. 7 installs in about half the time of Vista and its pretty darn simplistic to install. The first thing you see of Windows 7 is the fact that it runs a lot leaner than windows Vista. Its usage of computer resources is miniscule compared to vistas resource hogging ways.

Next thing to notice is the Gui looks almost exactly like Vista. Although the desktop is a tiny bit different. The taskbar is different in looks but almost tries too hard to be a one stop shopping for all your computer needs. This makes the taskbar a bit cluttered and too busy for my tastes. Two new features called aero snap and aero peek allow you to manipulate the desktop and surrounding windows with much more ease. Aero Snap allows you to snap a window to minimize it quickly my dragging it to the top or bottom of your screen. Aero peek allows you to peek at your desktop without minimizing all your windows, and while this is fun I rarely use it.

My favorite part of windows 7 is the ability to personalize your windows to your own taste instead of having to download scripts and programs to change things. The desktop will even rotate on a timely basis. All of this makes for a fully customizable windows experience.

Last but not Least Windows 7 is a scaled down striped out version of Vista and XP. No more dial up services and MSNBC trial versions, and AOL 100 free hour things. It’s just the bare-bones windows needed programs and necessary registry additions, for the most part.

 

Now just as a figment of my tin foil soaked imagination, does anyone remember the launch of ME. The ill fated bastard child of 98 and NT with an updated interface and file system.  For some reason I feel as if M$ is launching Vista with 7 up their sleeves in order to fool us into purchasing their OS systems twice. Only this time moving from the old to the new won’t be such a problem with consumers, hungry for something reliable.

June 17, 2009 Posted by | Normal Stuffs | , , , , , , | 7 Comments

GBU Review for Tomb Raider : Legend

Ahh Lara back again I see.  I used to dread the release of another new Tomb Raider.  I knew how it would go, the game would be thrown together in a month or two the graphics would be chunky and pixely and Lara’s boobs would be HUGE.  And that was the extent of the game.  The guns started to play too big of a role and the puzzles were more of an inconvenience and a hindrance to the game play.  Soon it was like watching Breaking Bonaduce.  Danny Bonaduce, such a HUGE kid star who had it all in the palm of his hand. Poor Danny goes on to drugs, violence, and reality TV.  My personal favorite was the show where he admitted to being a big pill hound.  Apparently he “took enough pills to get full.”

Well everyone gets second chances.  Now Danny Bonaduce is in Philadelphia on the radio, and Lara has her Legend status back.  Crystal Dynamics has given birth to a new sleek and stylish Lara. 

 

GOOD :  Graphics in this game are a definite improvement over the several other iterations of Lara’s adventures.  The buckles on Lara’s backpack and belt are surprisingly crisp…uhm not that I was staring at her belt.  Anyway the clothing and hair movement is more realistic and the surrounding backdrops are simply breathtaking.   Lara’s repertoire of parkour and acrobatic moves has increased from jump and skip to just about anything you can think of.   Your character’s movement is more fluid and lifelike instead of stick figurish, and it lends a whole new dynamic to the game.  The 3d angle camera is not so bad in this game as it is constantly over Lara’s shoulder instead of moving around or even worse stationary to the surrounding instead of planted to the character.

BAD : Huge Tomb Raider fans(like me) will more than likely notice the huge gaping inconsistencies in the storyline with regards to past games.  Lara’s parents, the relationship with her father, and the run in with Natla.  Hopefully Crystal Dynamics is the lasting word on the Tomb Raider Canon.  I would love to see the Tomb Raider history finally once and for all be cemented in by one solid company who can realistically take the story and do something incredible with it.  As for now the history and not the story is the bad thing about this game. 

UGLY:  The freaking game took me 9 hours to beat in the span of a weekend.  Although I guess having a short run at an amazing game is better than a crappy game that is extremely long.  Other than that nothing to complain about.

June 17, 2009 Posted by | Good Bad and the Ugly - Game Reviews | , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on GBU Review for Tomb Raider : Legend

Friday Night Horror Corner

Hello Fiends and welcome to the first of Friday night Horror Corner. I’m putting this up here because I know lots of you dream machines love your Horror movies as much as I do. I know you’re tired of finding a good title and getting all ready to watch it and all you see is bad computer gen movie effects and horrid acting. I’m tired of seeing nothing but bloody knives and T&A…well not that I’m tired of seeing T&A I’m just not so sure that directors know how to put it into a horror movies anymore.
So without further ado I’m going to tell you all about some GOOD horror movies. Horror movies made like they used to be made, movies that are made with suspense and fear in mind. The kind of movies that will put you to bed with the lights on

DeathWatch

DeathWatch

Deathwatch a film directed by Michael Bassett and released Nov of 2002 is a movie set in WW1 Western front. I am not going to ruin the movie for you I’m just going to tell you that it’s a war movie with a HUGE horror twist to it. This movie has everything suspense, blood, and absolute shock. The ending of this movie twisted me for a few days I had no idea it was coming like it did. Watch this movie and I guarantee you’ll love it if you don’t I’ll post pictures of me in a clown outfit.
For a real exciting night curl up on the couch turn off all the lights make some quesadillas and grab a six pack of mad elf beer. Throw this puppy in the dvd player and turn the surround system to 11. I’ll see you freaks and geeks next Friday.

June 12, 2009 Posted by | The Horror Corner | , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

GBU review for Condemned 2

Ok so Condemned 2 comes along and I LOVED the first one so much I ran out and got this one as soon as stores opened. I have to say I was annoyed with this game more than anything and it killed me to see such a great story crippled by game play. So without further ado…… Condemned 2 Bloodshot GOOD BAD and UGLY

GOOD: the strong story from the first Condemned fizzles a bit in this second installment. It’s a year later and a dejected, homeless and broken Ethan Thomas is called back to duty to help investigate a distressed call from his old mentor. The storyline itself isn’t too bad and actually kept me entertained. Also this new game allows for the one thing the last game didn’t. MULTIPLAYER! who doesn’t love multiplayer, zombies LOVE multiplayer so I LOVE MULTIPLAYER! Did I say it enough, I think so. Multiplayer was the greatest thing that could have been added to this game. This brought the game a whole new level of awesome, an awesome which allowed me to bludgeon my friends with bats and boards. Oh and as a side note the graphics are pretty dang good too. I didn’t want to forget the graphics since the first one was kind of like playing a movie.

BAD: Playing this game and the first one you learn things about Ethan Thomas. Players learn that Ethan is something of an Adept, at first minimal instinctual skills and a few spidey senses. The second installment would have you believe that suddenly Ethan can deal massive amounts of violence to his foes using his voice. I’m sorry but Muad’Dib Ethan is not. I just think that that’s as far fetched as it can get. Along the same lines the weapons in this game are far more fragile than the last. Hardly a fight goes by that your weapon don’t break and force you to melee fight with four or five bad guys. More on melee later, right now I would like to talk about alcohol. That’s right alcohol, Apparently Ethan is an alcoholic and needs enough booze to fuel a three day kegger to aim straight. If your not constantly getting alcohol you might as well drop the gun and resort to good old hand to hand.

UGLY: The fighting on this game was atrocious. If it wasn’t for the absolute mindless fury I was dealing with at the time I would have ditched this game. The controls for punching are a lot like fight night 2 and include a few surprises. The combos are far from simple and don’t start of very basic. It took me two controllers three nights and an entire bottle of jack daniels (for me not Ethan) to get past the first level. Although that being said once you get the hang of everything, things start to go smoother. Another thing to bother me about this game was the violence. The second installment of condemned lost a bit of its fear and suspense and develed a bit too deeply into a manhunt type bloodbath. Instead of traveling through extremely dark abandoned department stores and wondering when the bovine manure was going to strike the proverbial oscillating device, you’re now just charging through waves and waves of bloodthirsty drug zombies. Now charging through endless waves of zombies with nothing but a machete and a flashlight is indeed my own little version of heaven, but nevertheless the game suffers. The ending of the game allows for a third installment and good lord I hope it’s a good one.

June 11, 2009 Posted by | Good Bad and the Ugly - Game Reviews | , , , | Comments Off on GBU review for Condemned 2

GBU for Condemned: Criminal Orgins

My name is Atomic Zombie.

Im pretty sure im a cautionary tale to all gamers. I am the stereotypical middle aged gamer with a wife and a kid. I barely have time to play the games I have, so keeping up with my unmarried, and unhindered friends has killed my gamer street cred. I am about 2 – 3 years behind on current games and subsequent news, however I can change a diaper on a screaming child faster than Mr Magoo in a kydex speedo. Im mildly interested in Zombie movies and the horror genre, and attest that zombies cannot run jump or snarl as it were. Ive publicly attested that George Romero is in fact my real father, the resulting DNA test was negative but I still have hope. I enjoy First person shooters, REAL zombie games, anything militaristic, puzzle games , and long walks on the beach. I almost added RPG games but after a serious bout of WOW addiction and quitting cold turkey I seriously cannot list them, in fact I almost didnt get fallout 3 because of the fact it was an rpg. And me not playing a fallout game is well like the sun not coming up.
well thats pretty much me wrapped up in a nice little package. if you have questions about my personal life or my likes or dislikes ask my wife she knows better than I do.

So here’s my first review, Condemned CO was the first game I ever picked up for my 360. Ill get right to it than yes?

Good: This game had AMAZIING graphics and movie like sequences. With the lights off and the HD going this game looked amazing. The gameplay and controlls were simple but effective and the fighting was realistic. Picking up pipes and bats because bullets would run out three rooms after you picked up the guns. AWESOME! It has lots of replay value, this thing gets replayed every three to four months. The fighting and skull bashing is just way to much fun not to play it.

Bad: The story was actually bad. It was linear with a few jumps back and forth and overall made sense but it was just sinfully dumbed down. The game art looked alot like a redone Max Payne early levels. Although gladly it was just a darkened gameworld not a wannabe film noir representation of a crime novella.

Ugly: Really the only truely ugly thing about this game was the C.S.I. stuff. i felt some of it was thrown in as an afterthought. Although it did give the storyline a little more running room it didnt give the game any more playability.

June 3, 2009 Posted by | Good Bad and the Ugly - Game Reviews | , , , , , , | 2 Comments