Holy smokes. What an old blog! How is this thing even here? I mentioned in the post from about 18 years ago that we have in indeed moved and that’s ok. What’s more is that I’ve started a variety of websites since then that are worth mentioning.
The biggest is: Britpopnews.com – a website about Oasis, and variety of bands within that scene from the 90’s.
Collingswoodfoodies – a food blog
Mommyjessie – a mommy blog.
All of this wouldn’t be possible without this company I used several months ago to really clean up my career. I was kind of lost in a fog of …fog..and spending the money to have my resume redone really cleaned up that corporate junk that has infected my mind and it’s just something I really attribute to moving forward with my own business.
The time has come to move on. So fuck it. IM OUT. Join me, wont you?
Christmas has officially begun.
Today Macrumors posted an article saying that News Corp and Apple are teaming up for an Ipad app. Apparently it will be dubbed the daily, for distribution daily. The price will be 1$ a week (0.99) which is quite afforable. On one side you have the Fox News way of reporting that you are now paying for which is where the market will be going. Ala Itunes. You cant have free shit all the time can you? However, if you were a smart and aware shopper you would know that there are quite a few other free app’s out there that report the news. I take no sides inthe inevitable political angle this ALWAYS takes when involving Fox News, i’m simply stating that it’s not a bad thing to be aware.
Hiya everyone! You’ve had me since you picked me up from Wal-Mart on October 26th and it’s been an interesting journey so far. First let me say, thanks for bringing me home! I was getting pretty tired of seeing middle age poor trash pick their nose then pick me up. With that said it’s been really nice being inside your basement. I think a phrase comes to mind “lesser of two evils”.
At least….I think it’s a basement. The lights don’t turn on very much. It’s a good thing I’m not afraid of the dark. But I digress, after having been with you awhile I’d like to let you in on a few things.
1. I secretly hate you.
2. I can hear you (THERE IS A MIC DUH!) so I know each and every time you say not so nice things about me.
3. You can’t sing. At all. Because you just bellow the notes is because I am tired of you playing the same song after failing 5 times.
4. I know you hate “Midlife Crisis” by Faith No More, which is why it’s played so much on “random”.
5. I don’t cheat. You actually suck that bad. When your finger is on green and it’s a yellow note. That’s not my fault.
6. You have no timing. Hearing the note then playing it is now how music is made. That is called being “off beat”
Video Game player Spoogelord69 from New Baptist, Kentucky was sentenced to 15 years at a labour camp in the Gulag without an Xbox for his potential involvement on a (fictional) twitter account.
It all started on Wednesday Novemeber 10th 2010 when Spoogelord69 wrote “lawl plox at ur girlfriend I haz noodz of her lvl 70 shaman 2900 WHR in TB WTS 40g pst with offer” on his twitter account to the under secretary of the prime minister of bossmanistan. The Under Secretary then reported a possible TERRORIST threat to the Authorities who promptly put down their boston creame donuts and headed over to Spoogelord69’s house. Upon arrival Spooge’s parents directed the authorities to the basement where Spoogelord was holed up. After an hour long journey through empty cans of Monster and Twinkie wrappers the Authorities apprehended the suspect.
In response Spoogelord69, whose name is David Finkstien but also known under the alias’s of “bel biv devo, rock my Talent Tree, and Kris Kristofferson”, accused his friend Lawrence Phillips of hacking his account and sending out the Tweets. Lawrence was not available for comment. Spoogelord was convicted under the anti terrorism act enacted in the 1860’s in response to the rising fear that Turtleneck’s would be taking over the planet. Though the current threat level for Turtleneck’s is at yellow or, black, or mock-neck, it is still a capital offense to make such threats.
Spoogelord69 and his 16,500 achievement points were removed from the XBOX live network on Friday morning prior to the conviction. When asked by the presiding judge Suzy Lawpants, before being taken away to the Gulag, as to why he would convict a crime Spoogelord’s only response was that he was proud he was the first of his friends to get 60/60 achievements in Elder Scrolls Oblivlion.
The first single from Liam Gallagher’s new outfit,
Pretty Green (see what I did there) Beady Eye, released their first single today. It’s called “Bring the Light” and let me tell you, this single will not be bringing anything or even breaking any records. Well….maybe a fan breaking the record, but who really buys records anymore? Noel has to be laughing from his mountains of gold saying this is “little james” all over again.
The song starts out abruptly. It’s almost as if they are 20 seconds into the song and someone says “oh SHIT we were supposed to record this” and hastily pushed the record button. Right out of the gate you hear the Jerry Lee Lewis piano, which is brought to the forefront, along with Liams voice. Both of which quite frankly, at this point, suck. I’m being harsh, it’s not awful. It’s just extremely derivative of 50’s rock n roll. It sounds like Karaoke. As a long time fan I can safely say with Oasis it’s always been a “Where’s Waldo” exercise in finding out what band they stole a particular tune from and it’s been enjoyable. The thing is this one doesn’t so much steal as it does sounds exactly like an era. Yawn. Y’know, because I’ve been sitting around waiting for someone to re-live that grand era of music from the 1950’s. Instead of moving into 70′s Kinks land, which I half believed they would since they rock that Mod/Rocker thing…a “mocker” if you will…Beady Eye manages to move further backwards in time.
As is almost standard fare for Liam anymore, the song goes onto some very Beatle Rubber Soul/Revolver changes. UGH. THERES THOSE FUCKING WORDS AGAIN. Liam, on the real, I like the Beatles to. It’s just that it’s really time to move on. I’ll grant you that their depth of music is absurdly astounding, and for any band to cite them as influence is like saying you’re a bit like your own father or mother at times. SEE DUH. But, the thing is, I also like the Stone Roses, Early Verve, Ride, Ameican Analog Set and Explosions in the Sky and many more but not MGMT. NEVER MGMT. So, read all of that as: It’s Cool to like other bands NOT NAMED THE BEATLES . And man, I know you like other bands. And you’re Cool as Fuck like the Inspiral Carpets EP. Hell..you’ve got one of the guys FROM Ride in your band, and yet you guys digress into this?
Sadly I’m really left with a sour feeling in my mouth after this track, and also with a feeling that I’ll never really listen to this song willingly again. That’s really tragic because I fucking love the shit out of Oasis. And trust me there’s a lot of shit in this love, ok. So why the dislike? I put it down to the sheer boredom of this music. The lack of doing something interesting is puzzling to me even more so because, as I mentioned previously, Andy Bell is in the Band. I’ll skip his time in Hurricane #1 (UGH) time, as everything else he’s touched was fantastic. Even the Oasis B-sides and A-sides he got credited with. Now, I’m not so brazen to think that the first single is going to come out like Chelsea Girl, Perfect Time, or Leave them all behind, but maybe a guy can get a black night crash pt.2? Shit I’ll even settle for Black Night Crash 15 – IN SPAAAACE.
This song is simply put: Lifeless.
Maybe, I’m being ultra harsh. Maybe it’s just a song that will ‘grow’ on you in a live setting, or maybe it’s that Steve Lillywhite is so whitebread in his approach to recordings that he saps all life from the band in the process and is to blame. THE FUCKING LA’S. JUST SAYIN’. Wait a second. No. I’m not just sayin’. I’m RAGING. Lets take a moment to mourn the neverending let down known as The La’s Reformation. What a shame. It’s almost as bad as the Stone Roses neverunion.
Have you ever had a time where you wanted to buy something but couldn’t,or maybe didn’t want to just yet or were hesitant? You’ve had those moments before, I’m sure. Case in point: we both read the reviews about Star Wars Force Unleashed giving you jedi powers with a GREAT story you simply had to read. Then again, there was something inside you that said man those scores on Meta Critic seem a bit silly to me. Exclusive Content for the Wii? Seriously? Jar Jar Binks? REALLY? I know that last bit had nothing to do with the previously mentioned game but we all know that even the slightest hint of Jar Jar Binks appearing in any video game is call for a trip to the bathroom or at least a visit to your therapist. No disrespect to the voice actor, Ahmed Best, who voiced Jar Jar Binks. I’m sure you got paid handsomely dog but mesa thinks that shit suuuucked.
In any case, there was that itch on the back of your arse that said hold up there buddy. And you did. You held UP. Mostly because you hadn’t washed your undie’s for a few days but also because you have a keen intellect matched by only those with 5/5 Mage Tier 10. So lets cut to today and say you see it on sale for 5.99 or, in the “greatest hits” and wonder silently to yourself..greatest hits? Really? Well, sometimes, dudes and dudeettes…..you just gotta say “fuck it” and buy it. It’s only 5.99. What is that to you? 2 hours work at Dairy Queen?
I think the appropriate phrase is “quit being a bitch and come on”
This writer needs to ante up and buy a book that is only 6.99 worth 3 hours of work from his current job.
Mr. Elder, delegates, and my fellow Fallout Survivors … I accept your nomination. Thank you for this honor. Together, we will renew the Mojave Wastelands purpose.
Our founders first defined that purpose here in the Hidden Valley … Mr House was here. The NCR . And, of course, Dogmeat — or, as his friends called him, “Dogmeat.”
I am proud to have Veronica at my side. She is a woman of integrity and sound judgment, who has proven that public service can be noble service, and whose Power Fist One Shots anything.
The Capital Wastelands will be proud to have a leader of such character to succeed about 500,000 other paladins who have died to various Rad-Scorpions, Nightkin and Super Mutants.
I am grateful for John McCain and the other candidates who sought this nomination. Their convictions strengthen our party.
I am especially grateful tonight to my Talent’s given every 2 levels.
No matter what else I do in life, being single the best decision I ever made.
To our daughters whom,I totally forget and don’t call, I love you, I’m proud of you, and as you head off to college this fall … Don’t stay out too late, date a one legged ghoul and never, ever, e-mail your old dad though a hacked computer terminal ok?
And mother, no one loves you, including me.
Growing up, she gave me Rad-Away and lots of advice I do not use. I turned her into a ghoul by tossing her into Vault 87.
And I want to thank my father — the most decent man I have ever known before I stole his caps and fed him to a Deathclaw Alpha in Quarry Junction.
All my life I have been amazed that a gentle soul could be so strong yet have so many caps that he did not spend. Moron.
And Dad, I want you to know how proud I am to be your son because without you I wouldn’t be this rich.
My father was the last person to survive a nuclear attack from a China. He cam from a generation of Americans who stormed beaches, liberated concentration camps and delivered us into the Vaults.
Some never came home because they didn’t have enough Rad-Away.
Those who did put their medals in drawers and I stole them after their corpses went un-searched. I sold those medals for my Gauss Rifle. Thanks., it was a lot of Caps. Let us not forget them because they went to work, and built on a heroic scale … highways and universities, suburbs and factories, great cities and grand alliances — the strong foundations of the U.S.S.A that stand before you as your only cover against super mutants.
Now the question comes to the sons and daughters of this achievement; 44/100 completed woot!
What is asked of us?
This is a remarkable moment in the life of the Wastelands. Never has the promise of living through a nuclear holocaust been so vivid. But times of plenty, like times of crisis, are tests of a Paladin.
Prosperity can be a tool in our hands — used to build and better our country or your house in Nipton, Goodspring, or New Vegas! Or it can be a drug in our system — like Stimpacks , Classic Nukka Cola, Med-X’s, Mentats or Psycho, dulling our sense of urgency and destroying out AP in VATS.
Our opportunities are too great, our lives too short, to waste this moment. So tonight we vow to our nation …
We will seize this moment of Wasteland promise.
To every man and woman, a chance to eat CRAM and Iguana on a stick. To every child, a chance to read the Wasteland Survival Guide. To every family, a chance to listen to Galaxy News Radio. For eight years, the NCR has coasted through famine and plague. And the path of least resistance is always downhill.
But The Wastelands way is the rising of a head on a spike.
This nation is warring, evil and not ready for change.
Our current president embodied the potential of a generation. So many talents. So much charm 100/100! Such a great S.P.E.C.I.A.L. build. But, in the end, to what end? So much promise, to no great purpose.
Little more than 200 years ago, the Great War started and, with the leadership of President and the Enclave, we all ran to Vaults.
But instead of seizing this moment, the administration has squandered it. We have seen a steady erosion of Power Armor and an unsteady exercise of influence by living alone in the Brotherhood Bunker in Hidden Valley.
Our military is low on parts, pay and morale.
If called on by the commander-in-chief today, two entire divisions of the Brotherhood would have to report … Not ready for duty, sir.
This administration had its moment.
They had their chance. They have not led. We will.
This generation was given the gift of the best Power Armor in the Brotherhood of Steel history with the T-51b Power Armor. Yet we do not share that gift with everyone. Seven of ten fourth-graders in our highest poverty schools cannot read a simple pre war book or access their Pip-boy.
And still this administration continues on the same old path with the same old programs — while millions are trapped in Bukers where violence is common and learning is rare yet containing mountains of Caps. This administration had its chance. They have not led. We will.
They had their moment. They have not led. We will.
Our generation has a chance to reclaim some essential values — to show we have grown up before we grow old.
But when the moment for leadership came, this administration did not teach our children, it disillusioned them.
They had their chance. They have not led. We will.
And now they come asking for another chance, another shot. Our answer?
Not this time.
Not this Nuclear Holocaust.
OH MY GOD. Why..WHY. WHY HAVE YOU COME OUT WITH IT. The kid admits to being an aspie too!! UGH.
UGH. Every wow player will now seek the kid out. He just announced his own guild name. Dude..If you were in my guild, I would sell you out in a heartbeat. You sir are an idiot.
Everyone and their brother is complaining talking about how fun Fallout New Vegas is, but also how many glitches it has. I’m going to join the masses and point out a glitched moment but, also focus on not being a dick about it by running to the forums to complain. This might go into the Tips section for my Gamers Guide to a Personality. More fodder for my upcoming book which no one will buy.
The glitch occurred after I cleared out the REPCONN Test Site full of ghouls and managed to save not only the normal ghouls but also the Nightkin! Yay me right? Yeah, i’m a sucker for the good ending. Alone in a vast wasteland it’s me, myself, and my bottle of gin, saving humanity one gesture at a time. Awe. Feeling happy and secure I saved and went to bed at 1am. (UGH)
The next day, after a long day at work, I come home and let the wife play fable 2 for >4< hours then pop in the game about an hour past bedtime. The following is a (mostly) true story.
Happy fun save time REPCONN Facility
Cannot load game HAHA FU. (it really said FU, true story)
More uncomfortable silence
Select Auto Save 10 minutes prior to happy fun save time at REPCONN facility
Cannot load game
silent (response exaggerated to protect the innocent)
I’m kidding. I didn’t get angry. I laughed. Really, I did. Mostly because I was being a arrogant smug jerkface reading all the stories of people’s games bugging out while mine was not. “heh, look at those fools and their bugs. They cant touch me.” I was caught red handed at what I do so well. So I did what any self respecting gamer does. I called up a friend, in this case rich, and repeated the story. He suggested saving the entire game to my hard-drive. What FOREIGN CONCEPT IS THIS? Install to harddrive? he might as well be telling me to write up battle plans for invading china for crying out loud. Now, I’m sure he can pop in and tell you this but this is how the convo went.
“we’ve talked about this before.”
“We did?” – playing innocent because I know we must have in the past.
“yeah, you press the yellow button, Y, and install it to your harddrive. It saves time on the load, lessens the usage of your disc reader, and makes bunnies come rushing into your house to cuddle with you. Dude, dont you remember talking about it on the podcast?”
There are two points to this. One is to not be a smug jerkface and laugh at other people’s shit going wrong because it can just as easily happen to you. The other is that even when there is a moment when something goes totally fucking wrong and seemingly ruins what amounts to an epic battle, involving hours of running around a fucking maze like facility fending off people with a butterknife,in the process using all my fucking stimpaks, something good can always come from it. And that is the realization that I am, sometimes, a complete fucking jerkface that can now save games to my 20 gig harddrive.
I know what you’re thinking but…120$ for a 250 gig drive? as IF! TAKE THAT $$$SOFT.
Ahh and now comes my part of the day where I laugh evilly at people who..well….how do I put this? Hmmmmm. Haven’t yet interacted with Society in a healthy and appropriate manner? That works. Yeah.
Please enjoy these as I have
This will be my THIRD post in a row with one sentence.
EXCEPT NOT REALLY MWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA.
Yes, another fucking cat video has made it to the internets and yes, we are all fawning over how cute it is. Don’t you people realize this is a devious trap made up by liberal ,or..NO! RIGHT WING!!! Cats. Wait, no, CHECK THAT…TERROR-IST CATS! You’re either with them or against them…what will it be kiddo? I own three cats, I’m in yo.
I now present…Nora: Practice Makes Purr-fect (A+!)
Just watch..there are no words. Just. Watch.
He should not be allowed to breed.
I imagine you joyfully came home from gamestop (after being insulted a few times) with a massive grin on your face promptly tell your mom/family/roomates you hate to fuck off, because you are ready to play some Fallout New Vegas BOYEEEE! First thoughts as you run through the game’s starting credits are man…this feels good. REAL GOOD. It’s been months since you cracked out on any game like this – kind of like the excitment you feel if your old lady has come home after she’s been away at Anime Convention for months on end to find her in some japanimerpbullshit outfit. You lean back on your wobbly ikea sofa, feel the needle slide into your arm deep enough, and wake up in Goodspring. You are thinking dude where the SMEG am i? Goodspring? Oh NO they didn’t. This is no Vault 101 my fellow Fallout 3 crackheads. If you are like me you slammed your monster can down on the table and said THIS is NOT the VAULT and promptly stamped around in a circle a few times with your arms flailing about. What the FUCK! FFFFUUUUUUUU. Right?
You are nodding your head right now.
Well, I raged. Except not really.
After doing some run around talk to Sunny Smiles world of warcraft mailman quests (GOD)….you are hit with your first real quest (don;’t be a douchebag and correct me with all caps saying: THIS IS NOT THE FIRST QUEST) in Fallout New Vegas By a Campfire on the Trail. Now you are thinking this is Vegas! My first quest should be something where I kill a pimp so a stripper falls in love with me and we do lots of CO CO CO CO CAAAAINE, or get so much money that you can buy a stripper then do some CO CO CO CO-CAINE just so you can kill a pimp, or you all of a sudden become 15x your normal size and laugh maniacally over vegas like homer simpson after winning the lottery, stepping on pimps so you can get a stripper and do lots of? YOU GUESSED IT. CO CO CO CO CAINE
You would be wrong.
Instead…….wait for it……………………….you go and pick some flowers. Mother fucker said pick some flowers!!! So off you go to “find a broc flower and some XANDER ROOT”. Jesus christ. What kind of game is this where I have to go picking flowers? (clue: The Broc Flower is in the Good Springs Cemetery and the Xander Root it just outside of the door to the abandoned school house near a rock).
So what is it? What is this game? I want to kill some dudes with my ultra powerful LASOR cannon of DEATH in my kick ass power armor. This shit needs to get better fast but judging by the lameness of Fallout 3’s first 5-8 hours..I’m guessing right around the 5-8 hour mark. Which is O-K.
If you never saw the Whoahh!!!! Guys – aka jersey guido’s – or, whatever young kids call them these days, watch this.
I bring this up because I watched that clip about 10,000 times and laughed myself silly. The best part is now the Whoah!!! Guy is back and dancing at the club. I might watch this a few hundred times before the end of the day today. Who even dances like this.
Baby blue I see you in two weeks…
So there it is. Now – imagine what your character, in my case a tauren, will look like. I was a fan of Tier 10 – despite not ever being poopsock enough to actually get that gear but it got me thinking what was my favorite Shaman Set of Tier Gear. I’ll throw down because I’m a old dude anymore in this game, especialy when I know the vast majority of world of warcraft players are 18-24. I believe the % was under 5 according to my behind the scenes knowledge, WHATEVER. Do you even care about what I just said? I sure don’t!My favorite set was the Cyclone set. I just loved the lightbulbs as my shoulders. Blame is on my love of nightlights after watching scarey movies around the age of 10.
This set, on the other hand, looks a little druidey. I made up that word.Druideeeeeeey. You know what I mean. I think the reason I actually give a smeg about this set is that it’s, in all likely hood, the one I’ll be wearing for the next 2 years. I’ll join the raiding scene when everyone is still new and cant Gearscore check you like douchebags so that will give me an option to play. Fun times indeed. I know you’re excited. I am. Gimmie that set dog.
I’m putting up the 100 Greatest quotes from The Wire
I made a funny yesterday and I certainly don’t blame my self. What self respecting person would? I kid. It was my fault – I didn’t look. But I’m still not going to give up that it’s not completely my fault if something is messed up in the first place. I’m talking about the Sony Playstation store and the insane belief that one should be able to get a refund.
First off it stats right there in that little box image that what I was buying is a PSP game – which I already own on a system that BROKE OVER THE GOD DAMN WEEKEND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE GAME. RAGE! GOD! Anyways, I have the insane belief to read the main text in the middle of the page and not automatically assume, hey I’m buying the WRONG PRODUCT. Well, I did. And it’s my mistake. So I go searching online as my generation is so wont to do and I find this little bit of Grade A customer service.
“All PlayStation®Store sales are final (no refunds) per the PlayStation®Network Terms of Service and User Agreement.”
What the fuck is this some bodega in the hood? Out of the millions of users that sony has, and I’m sure judging by just living every day in Philadelphia, or just gaming on the xbox live experience nevermind years of wow player stories, there are a bunch of complete and total moron’s out there! Someone will make a mistake. People do. We’re not perfect. Toss in someone’s money and you’re just begging for a disaster. I won’t even go into the whole “you signed this 12 page document that would require years of legal counsel to even begin understanding” as the whole “told you so”. I just cant deal with that much anger this morning. Well..10$ later, or 300$ later, however you want to spell it in my case, I had a bad sony weekend. But hot damn, Pixel Junk Monsters is fun!