Viral Video Game Blog

The Most desired thing by a gamer in the entire world is…


I went into a gamestop to buy Madden 06 (fuck you dont laugh) and was greeted not by some 16 year old, awful, neckbeard type who somehow remembers playing games 17 years ago, but by a girl gamestop employeel! I should have known by the way the other guy employee’s were squirming and then acting all tough by saying silly things like “I beat tekken three on ultra super duper hardmode on day of release”.

As I walked through the store she awkwardly said hello to me and asked the normal question every.single.employee of a mall type store asks “are you looking for anything”. No, dipshit, sometimes I like to fucking walk around.And Certainly when I walk into a store to get one thing it’s certainly not a Gamestop. Anyways, what striked me different about her was that she was thin and…get this…. asian!

!!!!

I KNOW RIGHT. AZN!? A GIRL? OMFGOMFGOMFGOMFGOMFG. At that moment I realized I was looking at virtually every single neckbeard’s dream girl. Let alone the fact she is..a SHE, that alone would be enough to make any neckbeard guy go crazy,she also liked video games! was not overweight! (irony at it’s best) and the most important thing is that she was asian and therefore had a strong possiblity of liking fucking.japanmie.rp.bullshit. I can only imagine something she experiences about 2.5 seconds after meeting a neckbeard. He gazes off into the distance dreaming of sipping Monster Drinks together while watching fucking Anime. Drool starts forming around the chubby cheeks and then he’s snapped back to reality as she asks that fucking awful question….

Anyways…This girl was not particularly cute, or smart or, even…human…but I realized what I was looking at for millions of basement dwelling neckbeards – the more desired thing in the world. A thin asian girl gamer.

I left before 10,000,000 neckbeard white-knights came to her bad humor defense.

July 16, 2010 Posted by | Normal Stuffs | , , , , , | Comments Off on The Most desired thing by a gamer in the entire world is…

Portal 2 announced!

Hellz yes! Portal was one of my favorite games EVER. It’s not everyday that the first person genre gives you something new to do instead of just shooting people. But also something smart such as trying to solve insane room puzzles that, if existed….well, would probably be like watching Lost 🙂 Anyway, by way of Kotaku, here’s the Gamestop product description, promising that the game will drop in the fall on Xbox360 and PC.

“Coming this holiday. Portal 2 is the sequel to 2007’s Game of the Year and draws from the award-winning formula of innovative game play, story, and music that earned the original over 70 industry accolades. Features single and multiplayer co-op modes. The single-player portion of Portal 2 introduces a cast of dynamic new characters, a host of fresh puzzle elements, and a much larger set of devious test chambers. Players will explore never-before-seen areas of the Aperture Science Labs and be reunited with GLaDOS, the occasionally murderous computer companion who guided them through the original game. The game’s two-player cooperative mode features its own entirely separate campaign with a unique story, test chambers, and two new player characters. This new mode forces players to reconsider everything they thought they knew about portals. Success will require them to not just act cooperatively, but to think cooperatively.”

Can’t wait…speaking of Lost, you guys check out any of the Paleyfest panel stuff last week? Funny stuff when asked about a Lost themed Disney ride.

“Damon says there’s no need for an island to have a Lost-themed ride at Disney World: “Just put people in a black room, spin them around and punch them in the face and tell them ‘You just had the Lost experience.’” So true, 🙂

March 5, 2010 Posted by | Normal Stuffs | , , , , , , | Comments Off on Portal 2 announced!

PS3 Bundle with Final Fantasy VII

I tend to err on the side of caution when nothing is cited in a article but we’ll report this anyways. Kotaku is saying that Gamestop is saying That I’m saying what we’re saying is the 80 Gig PS3 will be bundled with Final Fantasy VII at the $399.99 price at your local Gamestop’s. It’s Part of a One-off promotion. Thing is, nowhere on Gamestop’s website is this listed nor, is it listed on Sony’s PS3 site. Futhermore for a promotion starting June 2nd, that’s awfully LATE to announce this as Kotaku puts it “This is a one time only pack-in by stores offer to boost sales” on the PS3 80GB units”.

May 30, 2009 Posted by | Normal Stuffs | , , , , , | Comments Off on PS3 Bundle with Final Fantasy VII