Hiya everyone! You’ve had me since you picked me up from Wal-Mart on October 26th and it’s been an interesting journey so far. First let me say, thanks for bringing me home! I was getting pretty tired of seeing middle age poor trash pick their nose then pick me up. With that said it’s been really nice being inside your basement. I think a phrase comes to mind “lesser of two evils”.
At least….I think it’s a basement. The lights don’t turn on very much. It’s a good thing I’m not afraid of the dark. But I digress, after having been with you awhile I’d like to let you in on a few things.
1. I secretly hate you.
2. I can hear you (THERE IS A MIC DUH!) so I know each and every time you say not so nice things about me.
3. You can’t sing. At all. Because you just bellow the notes is because I am tired of you playing the same song after failing 5 times.
4. I know you hate “Midlife Crisis” by Faith No More, which is why it’s played so much on “random”.
5. I don’t cheat. You actually suck that bad. When your finger is on green and it’s a yellow note. That’s not my fault.
6. You have no timing. Hearing the note then playing it is now how music is made. That is called being “off beat”
As reported everywhere in the planet, even KOTAKU, Rock Band 3 will be released. This time..IN SPACE. I’m kidding. Fuck that band. Even from a self proclaimed 90’s British Rock fan I’m saying fuck that band.
See for yourself.
Sorry to steal that 30 seconds of your life. Sorry, no refunds. I cannot give it back.
Hennyways Kotaku writes (because I’m quite frankly too lazy and you come because you don’t want to filter through all that ANIME RP BULLSHIT right?!). “The keyboard is a “25-key, fully functioning MIDI” version of the real thing, and is one of two key improvements made to the game, the other being the introduction of a new “Rock Band Pro” mode for expert players, which replaces coloured tabs with real musical symbols in an effort to get players on the track to playing real instruments.”
Whatever, keyboards. That’s so early 90’s. Two things I gleaned from this article.
HUEY LEWIS AND THE MOTHER FUCKING NEWS
and..seemingly continued lack of Kinks is freaking odd. Steve Miller band over the kinks? Seriously? I bet by the time they do add kinks it will be something like Come Dancing, I just know it. Ugh. Whatever lets talk about fun things because we loves funs things?!
Here’s the tracklist for Rock Band 3. You have permission to go squee.
Combat Baby — Metric
Dead End Friends — Them Crooked Vultures
Get Free — The Vines
Lasso — Phoenix
Me Enamora — Juanes
Oh My God — Ida Maria
Portions of Foxes — Rilo Kiley
The Hardest Button to Button — The White Stripes
Been Caught Stealing — Jane’s Addiction
In the Meantime — Spacehog
Plush — Stone Temple Pilots
Walkin’ on the Sun — Smash Mouth
Crazy Train — Ozzy Osbourne
Here I Go Again — Whitesnake
I Love Rock and Roll — Joan Jett
Just Like Heaven — The Cure
Rainbow in the Dark — Dio
The Power of Love — Huey Lewis and the News
Sister Christian — Night Ranger
Bohemian Rhapsody — Queen
Break On Through — The Doors
Crosstown Traffic — Jimi Hendrix”